#NabloPoMo Day-9.
This is an open-ended post because I am sure it has interesting perspectives that I must have missed, so please feel free to pitch in.
Recently, while having a casual conversation with my sister, an interesting perspective came to the fore. Apparently,in the traditional families across India, a woman does not address her husband by his name. Now, this is not very uncommon given the Indian traditional scenario. Different parts of the country have different ways for a woman to address the husband. But here, I am quickly going to talk about the one that I found to be the most interesting.
After digging a bit deeper on the topic, I understood that a good part of Rajasthan, Haryana, Uttar Pradesh, Chhattisgarh and Madhya Pradesh (the traditional families, with semi-urban/rural set-up), instead of addressing the husband by his name, address him by their son’s name. And no, not like “Pappu ke Papa“, but Pappu itself!
No, please don’t ask me:
a) How does the right “Pappu” make out which one is being talked to
b) What if the couple has no son/kids.
Educate me if you have the answers to these please. 🙂
While I have known many women to address their husbands by various other names instead of their real name (‘Ae jee’/ Suniye take the cake), this one factor across India has huge variety. I am told that languages, cultures and family-systems play an important role in something that earlier seemed like a no-brainer to me. A lot of people argue that it stems from the Islamic culture, but I doubt that a culture that has roots in Islam alone, would so deeply and organically be embedded in the Hindu society. With this, I would like to take your leave. Over to you.
1) How do the women in your family address their hubby?
2) Any interesting tradition on this topic that you know of ? 😀
I have never heard my mother addressing my dad by name or anything. She will just manage with sentences without subject or an addressing. My wife says a wide range of things depending upon her precise mood.
Liked your post and your blog layout as well.
Wow! the sea of change between the two generations is admirable! Both have their own charm 🙂 If I may ask, what part of the country do you/your parents belong to?
Thank you so much Abhra 😀
My Mom..Never calls my Dad by His name–In Assamese most of the Wives call their Husband as “Aye Ri” that translate to “Aye Ji” in Hindi..
But the Topic you Picked up is interesting indeed.. 😀
See! it makes sense to keep the topic open-ended. While one might explore the flora and fauna of a place, the cultural intricacies can only be learnt from the locals of a place 😀
Harsha, “Aye ji” is what most of the moms say. 😀
My sis and I were aghast, when as grown ups, we realised that mom didn’t call out to our father by his name. So then we pushed mom to address dad by his name and now she does!
Hey Manali,
My mother still doesn’t call my father by his name. When we questioned her once, we realized it is too late for her to change.
Strange systems our culture ingrains in people in the name of ‘respect’. 😀